So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
