In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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