your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize