yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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