On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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