i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
