Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
It's blow job season.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
