my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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