yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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