Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
