OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize