hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
