Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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