I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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