it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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