You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
