umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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