We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
