Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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