Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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