Small penises have feelings too.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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