Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Randomize
