it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
