And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I got inside last night via doggy door
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
