operation harelip BJ is a go
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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