So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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