So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize