She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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