The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
