If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize