First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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