:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
