If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize