Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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