The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Randomize
