Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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