ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My vagina is officially offended.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
