$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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