I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
