see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
