Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
