I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
