I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
