omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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