in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
