i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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