I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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