I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
