Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
