okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize