It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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