Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
